Friday, May 27, 2016

The Church Lady and Motorcycle White Boy : Vanessa Goes to Washington


The immediate set-up: On Monday, May 16, my gift-from-God, happily-ever-after trophy wife Vanessa, the elegant, foxy, praying black grandmother of Woodstock, GA, was released from her position as a legal parapro at a small legal firm doing business primarily in the Woodstock area. For several days, we contemplated our next move.

Some deep background, and a sort-of real-life fairy tale: Vanessa's first husband gave her seven children, and then abandoned her to raise them as best she could. Using Social Services provided in North Carolina and West Virginia, Vanessa was able to earn her General Equivalency diploma, and continued on to college at West Virginia University. She moved to Georgia in 2001, had her prior coursework accepted for transfer, and became an upper classman at the prestigious Spelman College of Atlanta University. She was selected to serve as one of the Student Delegates to the Democratic National Convention in 2004; with her fellow college students, she traveled by bus to Boston to see John Kerry and John Edwards picked as the Democratic Party candidates for President and Vice-President.
Her plan was to continue to empower others politically; however a family crisis in 2007 required her to choose between her personal goals and the needs of her family. Tragically, at the same time her own mother passed, it became necessary for her to step forward and take in a toddler and an infant. These were her grandchildren; so, she sacrificed her own career and raised them as her own. Her political dreams were placed on hold, and she exchanged her classes at Spelman for the rituals of daycare arrangements while holding down a full-time job as a legal parapro to pay the bills. And that involved getting up every morning, getting two teenage girls off to high school, preparing two children for childcare, and later kindergarten, going to work all day, picking up children, stopping by the grocery store, making dinner, feeding children, making sure papers were signed, doing laundry, repeat; every day, every single day, and collapsing into bed at night. Weekends were time to recuperate, a little, on Saturday, and buy groceries. Sundays were for church, and a big meal for as many of her children as she could persuade to show up. And then collapse into bed again, because Monday morning came earlier and earlier, it seemed.
And that's the way it went, until Christmas of 2010, when a crippled bearded motorcycle white boy showed up at her door, with presents for her children, and a 40 year old high school ring and his Army dog tags for her, and told her that when she asked him to marry her, he would say yes.

Back to the present day: the motorcycle white boy speaks. I get email from the White House; it's what happens automatically if you ever email them about a concern. Sometime I just trash before reading, but I read this one; it announced a search for women of influence to attend The White House Summit "The United State Of Women." (Diana Ross was going to be there!) Since I happen to believe I am married to one tough lady, who has worked hard for everything she got, and raised seven children while doing it, I nominated her, with a smidgen of 'Deep background' included as the reason for the nomination. I didn't hold out much hope, frankly; I knew there were going to be lots of high-powered women who would love to get invited to Washington (it turned out there were more than 10,000 applications during the few days they were open. But, on May 25, I received :

Dear Vanessa Kay,
Congratulations! You are one of the nominees chosen to attend The United State of Women Summit on June 14th here in Washington, DC.

And we registered the same day! The event is going to be held at the Walter E. Washington Convention Center, a few blocks from the White House. There will be lots and lots of Women of Power there, but only ONE will have the title of  "Praying Black Grandmother"  on her name tag.

14 comments:

  1. Way to go, Vanessa!And good on you, Pat, for doing what you could to make sure she got that nomination.

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  2. Wow. What a woman of character and faith. Reminds me of another women I know, who's iron determination caused her to continue on after her first husband left her with two small children and no money.
    The good ones - they find a way to make it. And they make people proud to know them.

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  3. Is Kay her middle name? Also, WOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOO!!!!!! So proud of her!!!!!!

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  4. Awesome! What a story. She's a real special lady.

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  5. Oustanding! Go up there and do good!

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  6. That is a lovely story, Pat. All best to you and your lovely Vanessa. I hope she enjoys herself immensely in DC; they will be much the richer for her being there, for sure.

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  7. What an honor! Vanessa is one very tough lady (I do have a little knowledge about such things) and, without knowing you, I would say you are one remarkable husband. Congratulations to you both.

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  8. What an honor! Vanessa is one very tough lady (I do have a little knowledge about such things) and, without knowing you in person, I would say you are one remarkable person/husband. Congratulations to you both.

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  9. What an honor! Vanessa is one very tough lady (I do have a little knowledge about such things) and, without knowing you in person, I would say you are one remarkable person/husband. Congratulations to you both.

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  10. Wow! And wow again! Huge congrats to you both!

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  11. It's never too late for a woman to get into politics. In fact I wish more politicians had more "Real life" experience and less time in office.

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  12. Awesome! It's Washington, so I usually question the integrity of those who attend these kinds of things, but at least THIS time, I know there will be someone I can truly and deeply respect in attendance!

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  13. Hurray! Good for you for nominating her. Very good for her, being the hard-working strong woman she is.

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  14. Wow That is awesome.... Now the White knows what we already knew. Vanessa is one beautiful Godly strong and determined praying woman! So excited for you all.

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